Professional Examiners Trained to APA Standards
140+ Professional Testing Locations Across the U.S. & Canada
Trusted by 10,000+ Clients, Attorneys & Organizations
LieDetectorTest.com Private & Confidential Polygraph Provider

Why Do People Lie to Therapists? 10 Reasons Explained

93% of therapy clients lie to their therapist. Discover the 10 psychological reasons behind dishonesty in therapy and how to build trust for better outcomes.

Published April 13, 2025 Updated July 24, 2026 33 min read All articles

Even in the safest room, people hold back; this look at ten reasons clients lie to therapists reveals the deception dynamics a lie detector test is built to surface.

Research from Columbia University reveals that 93% of therapy clients are dishonest with their therapist at some point. This guide explores the ten core psychological reasons behind dishonesty in therapy, its impact on treatment outcomes, and evidence-based strategies for building the trust needed for meaningful therapeutic progress.

93%Clients Who Lie
72.6%Therapy-Related Lies
54%Minimize Distress
10Key Reasons

TL;DR — The Short Version

  • Lying in therapy is nearly universal — 93% of clients admit to being dishonest with their therapist at some point during treatment, based on a landmark survey of 547 psychotherapy clients at Columbia University.
  • Fear and shame are the primary drivers — 61% of clients cited shame and embarrassment as their primary motivation for dishonesty in therapy sessions.
  • Distress minimization is the most common lie — 54% of therapy clients reported pretending to feel happier and healthier than they really were.
  • The therapeutic alliance is essential — multiple meta-analyses confirm the quality of the client-therapist relationship is a robust predictor of positive treatment outcomes across all approaches.
  • Confidentiality has legal limits — therapists must report imminent danger to self or others, child abuse, elder abuse, or when compelled by court order.
  • Switching therapists is valid — if trust cannot be established, finding a new therapist is a legitimate and healthy decision.
  • Polygraph testing is used in specialized therapeutic settings, particularly in PCSOT programs for sex offender treatment accountability and in sexual addiction disclosure programs.

Who This Guide Is For

  • Therapy clients who recognize they may be withholding or distorting information in sessions
  • Individuals considering therapy who are anxious about the honesty required
  • Therapists and counselors looking for insights into client deception patterns
  • Mental health professionals exploring how polygraph testing integrates with therapeutic practices
  • Partners, parents, or family members supporting a loved one's therapeutic journey

How Common Is Lying in Therapy?

The Columbia University Research

The assumption that people enter therapy fully prepared to be honest is, according to research, overwhelmingly incorrect. A landmark study published in the journal Counselling Psychology Quarterly by researchers Matt Blanchard and Barry A. Farber at Columbia University's Teachers College surveyed 547 adult psychotherapy patients and found that 93% reported lying to their therapist at some point during their treatment [1]Verified Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.
. As Farber, a professor in the clinical psychology program at Columbia, noted: "Lying in therapy is not just common, it's ubiquitous" [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
.

This research was later expanded in the 2019 book Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy by Farber, Blanchard, and Melanie Love, published by APA Books, which reported on two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. In their second survey, 84% of nearly 800 respondents reported there was a topic they had deliberately avoided or been substantially dishonest about in therapy [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. A replication study by Curtis (2020) found similar rates, with 89% of participants endorsing at least one form of deception in therapy [4]Verified Deception in psychotherapy: Frequency, typology and relationship
Replication study confirming 89% of participants endorsed at least one form of deception in therapy, corroborating Blanchard & Farber findings.
.

Perhaps even more telling is the specificity of these lies. The Blanchard and Farber research revealed that approximately 72.6% of lies were therapy-related deceptions — lies about the therapeutic process itself, the therapist's effectiveness, and the client's genuine experience of treatment [1]Verified Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.
[4]Verified Deception in psychotherapy: Frequency, typology and relationship
Replication study confirming 89% of participants endorsed at least one form of deception in therapy, corroborating Blanchard & Farber findings.
. Clients reported pretending to like their therapist's comments, dissembling about why they were late or missed sessions, and pretending to find therapy effective [1]Verified Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.
. The most commonly lied-about topic was distress minimization: 54% of respondents in the first study reported pretending to feel happier and healthier than they really were [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
.

Why This Matters for Treatment

These figures reveal a profound paradox at the heart of mental health treatment. People invest significant time, emotional energy, and financial resources into therapy, yet they simultaneously undermine its effectiveness by withholding the truth. Notably, 73% of respondents in Farber's research said the truth about their lies had never been acknowledged in therapy, and only 3.5% of patients owned up to lies voluntarily [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
. Therapists detected client lies in only about 9% of cases [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
.

When therapists cannot access accurate information about their clients' mental states, treatment plans become misaligned and therapeutic breakthroughs are delayed. Research on non-disclosure shows that approximately one-third of individuals who withheld relevant information believed it hurt their therapeutic progress [5]Verified Psychological inflexibility prospectively predicts client non-disclosure in outpatient psychotherapy
Confirms 28-53% of clients intentionally kept secrets from therapist, and one-third believed non-disclosure hurt their progress.
. This connects directly to broader questions about the psychology of lying and deceptive behavior, including how human deception mechanisms operate even in settings designed to promote honesty.

Research on memory distortions and confabulation demonstrates that not all inaccurate information shared in therapy is deliberate — confabulated memories can feel entirely genuine to the person sharing them, creating challenges for both therapeutic and forensic assessment contexts [6]Verified Memory Distortions, Confabulation, and Their Impact on Polygraph Examinations
Confirms confabulated memories can produce genuine-feeling physiological responses, relevant to understanding unconscious distortion in therapy.
.

10 Reasons Why People Lie to Their Therapist

1. Fear of Being Misunderstood or Rejected

Fear is perhaps the most powerful driver of deception in therapy. Clients enter the therapy room carrying not just their presenting problems but deep-seated anxieties about how they will be perceived. This fear operates on multiple levels: fear that the therapist will not understand their experiences, fear that their feelings will be dismissed, and fear that revealing their true selves will lead to rejection.

For individuals who have experienced invalidation in their personal relationships, these fears are amplified. A client who grew up being told their emotions were "too much" will naturally bring those expectations into the therapy room. The fear of rejection in therapy also connects to attachment theory — clients with insecure attachment styles (anxious, avoidant, or disorganized) are more likely to engage in deceptive behavior as a protective mechanism. Understanding why people lie even when they don't have to reveals how deeply rooted these fear responses can be.

Research on deception detection shows that both police officers and lay people endorse stereotypical but non-diagnostic nonverbal cues as indicators of deception [7]Verified Strong, but wrong: lay people's and police officers' beliefs about verbal and nonverbal cues to deception
Confirms both police officers and lay people endorsed non-diagnostic nonverbal cues as deception indicators, with no professional advantage in detection.
, reinforcing clients' fears that their therapists may misjudge their intentions based on surface-level behavioral cues rather than deeper understanding.

2. Avoiding Judgment

While professional ethics dictate that therapists maintain a non-judgmental stance, clients are acutely aware that therapists are human beings with their own values and biases. The fear of judgment encompasses several specific concerns: lifestyle choices, sexual behaviors, substance use, financial decisions, and relationship patterns.

Research in social psychology has extensively documented the human tendency toward impression management — the process by which we attempt to control how others perceive us. In therapy, where clients are supposed to drop their social masks, impression management persists because the underlying psychological mechanisms do not simply switch off when someone enters a therapy room. Even subtle cues from the therapist — a raised eyebrow, a slight shift in posture, or a momentary pause — can be interpreted by sensitive clients as signs of judgment.

For clients with narcissistic vulnerabilities or fragile self-esteem, even imagined judgment can trigger defensive dishonesty. This pattern is closely related to what researchers describe as compulsive lying behavior, where deception becomes an automatic self-protective response rather than a deliberate strategy.

3. Shame About Painful or Embarrassing Details

Shame is one of the most corrosive human emotions and a primary barrier to honesty in therapy. Researcher Brene Brown, who has studied shame for over two decades, distinguishes between guilt ("I did something bad") and shame ("I am bad"), noting that shame strikes at the core of identity [8]Verified Shame Resilience Theory: A Grounded Theory Study on Women and Shame
Confirms Brown's research on shame thriving in secrecy, and the distinction between shame (identity-based) and guilt (behavior-based).
. Brown's research demonstrates that shame thrives in secrecy, silence, and judgment — and that the act of sharing shameful experiences in an empathic environment is precisely what dissolves shame's power [8]Verified Shame Resilience Theory: A Grounded Theory Study on Women and Shame
Confirms Brown's research on shame thriving in secrecy, and the distinction between shame (identity-based) and guilt (behavior-based).
.

In the Farber research, shame and embarrassment were the most frequently cited motivators for dishonesty in therapy, reported by 61% of respondents [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. Common sources of shame that clients conceal include sexual abuse or assault they have experienced, sexual behaviors they consider unacceptable, addiction, financial problems, fantasies about harming themselves or others, and perceived failures as parents, partners, or professionals.

This creates a therapeutic paradox: the very information clients most need to share is the information they are most motivated to conceal. Understanding this dynamic is particularly important in specialized settings such as sexual addiction disclosure programs, where structured approaches help clients overcome the shame barrier. The relationship between shame and habitual lying patterns reveals how secrecy can become self-reinforcing.

4. Denial and Lack of Self-Awareness

Not all therapeutic dishonesty is conscious or intentional. Denial is a psychological defense mechanism in which the mind protects itself from threatening information by refusing to acknowledge its existence or significance. A client may genuinely believe they are being honest while simultaneously suppressing, minimizing, or distorting critical information about their mental state.

Denial operates on a spectrum from mild minimization to complete dissociation from reality. A client might acknowledge feeling "a little stressed" when they are actually experiencing severe depression, describe a relationship as "mostly fine" while concealing patterns of abuse, or characterize their alcohol consumption as "social drinking" when it has become a dependency.

Cognitive distortions — systematic errors in thinking identified by cognitive behavioral therapy — play a significant role in this process. Minimization, rationalization, all-or-nothing thinking, and selective abstraction can all lead clients to present an inaccurate picture without the conscious intention to deceive. Research on memory suppression demonstrates that people can genuinely alter their own memories, making suppressed autobiographical content neurologically indistinguishable from never-experienced events [9]Verified Suppressing unwanted autobiographical memories reduces their automatic influences
Confirms memory suppression can eliminate physiological markers of recognition, relevant to understanding unconscious distortion in self-report.
. This underscores the complexity involved in distinguishing deliberate deception from unconscious distortion, a challenge faced by both therapists and polygraph examiners assessing people with mental health conditions.

5. Fear of Mandatory Reporting

Therapists in most jurisdictions are mandated reporters, legally required to break confidentiality under specific circumstances. This legal obligation, while essential for public safety, creates a real barrier to honesty in therapy, particularly for clients experiencing suicidal ideation, engaging in illegal behavior, or who have knowledge of abuse.

The fear of mandatory reporting is not irrational. Clients who disclose suicidal thoughts may face involuntary psychiatric holds. Those who reveal illegal drug use may worry about law enforcement involvement. Parents who describe moments of losing their temper may fear child protective services investigations. Research from Blanchard and Farber (2020) specifically examined patients' reasons for concealing suicidal ideation in psychotherapy, finding that fear of hospitalization and other adverse consequences were significant barriers to disclosure [10]Verified 'It is never okay to talk about suicide': Patients' reasons for concealing ideation in psychotherapy
Confirms patients conceal suicidal ideation due to fear of hospitalization and other adverse consequences.
.

Experienced therapists address this barrier directly during the informed consent process at the beginning of treatment. In the Farber team's second survey, 46% of clients reported they would have been more honest if the therapist had asked direct questions [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
, suggesting that transparent discussion of confidentiality boundaries can help reduce fear-based concealment.

6. Insufficient Rapport and Trust

The therapeutic alliance — the quality of the working relationship between therapist and client — is consistently identified in research as one of the most important predictors of positive therapy outcomes. A comprehensive meta-analysis by Fluckiger, Del Re, Wampold, and Horvath (2018) analyzed 295 studies and confirmed a stable correlation (r =.28) between alliance quality and treatment outcomes, independent of psychotherapy approach [11]Verified The alliance in adult psychotherapy: A meta-analytic synthesis
Confirms stable correlation (r =.28) between therapeutic alliance and treatment outcomes across 295 studies.
. The third edition of Psychotherapy Relationships That Work, edited by Norcross and Lambert (2019), synthesizes decades of evidence confirming that the therapeutic relationship is a robust, independent predictor of treatment success [12]Verified Psychotherapy Relationships That Work: Volume 1: Evidence-Based Therapist Contributions (3rd ed.)
Confirms the therapeutic relationship is a robust, independent predictor of treatment outcomes across all psychotherapy modalities.
.

Without a solid foundation of rapport and trust, clients will naturally withhold information and engage in defensive communication. Trust must be actively built through consistent demonstrations of empathy, reliability, and genuine care. For many clients, especially those with histories of betrayal, abuse, or unstable relationships, trusting a new person feels inherently dangerous.

The early sessions are particularly vulnerable to dishonesty because the relationship has not yet been tested. Several factors influence how quickly therapeutic trust develops: the client's attachment history, previous therapy experiences, cultural attitudes toward mental health, the therapist's interpersonal warmth, and the specific nature of what needs to be disclosed.

7. Protecting Self-Image and Ego

When we reveal our deepest fears and most embarrassing thoughts to another person, our self-image inevitably takes a blow. Research confirms that clients frequently hide information to construct and maintain a desirable impression [1]Verified Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.
. This is not mere vanity — it reflects a fundamental human need to preserve a coherent, positive sense of self.

Self-image protection manifests in several ways. Clients may exaggerate their strengths while minimizing their struggles, present themselves as more insightful or resilient than they feel, or avoid topics requiring them to acknowledge unacceptable aspects of their character.

Erik Erikson's psychosocial theory of development is relevant here. Erikson proposed that across the lifespan, individuals face a series of conflicts that shape personality, with the final stage (Ego Integrity vs. Despair, typically in late adulthood) involving the acceptance of one's life as meaningful and whole [13]Verified Erikson's Stages of Psychosocial Development
Confirms Erikson's eight stages of psychosocial development, with Ego Integrity vs. Despair as the final stage in late adulthood.
. At every stage, maintaining a sense of coherent identity is fundamental — and when therapy threatens that sense by requiring acknowledgment of weakness or moral compromise, the ego deploys defensive strategies, including dishonesty.

This dynamic is especially pronounced in clients who derive significant self-worth from being perceived as competent. Executives, healthcare professionals, and high-achieving students may find it particularly difficult to acknowledge the depth of their struggles. Understanding the difference between compulsive and pathological lying can help therapists recognize when self-image protection has become a deeply ingrained pattern.

8. Transference and Countertransference Dynamics

Transference, a concept originating in psychoanalytic theory, occurs when a client unconsciously transfers feelings about significant people in their life onto the therapist. This can lead to complex patterns of deception that neither party may be fully aware of.

For example, a client whose parent was emotionally volatile may instinctively censor their disclosures to avoid triggering perceived anger in the therapist. A client who felt they had to be the "perfect child" may replicate that dynamic by presenting only their best self. A client punished for honesty in their family of origin may automatically default to deception in any authority relationship.

Transference also manifests as the desire to impress or please the therapist. Some clients develop idealized feelings and lie to maintain the therapist's positive regard, reporting improvement they haven't experienced or concealing relapse to avoid disappointment.

Countertransference — the therapist's unconscious emotional reactions to the client — can compound the problem. If a therapist subtly communicates discomfort with certain topics, the client may adjust their disclosures accordingly, creating a mutual avoidance pattern. Recognizing and working through transference patterns is actually a valuable therapeutic opportunity that can provide insight into the relational patterns causing distress.

9. Insufficient Time to Open Up

Building a relationship that supports profound honesty takes time, and many clients underestimate how long this process requires. When comfort does not materialize quickly, clients may interpret it as a problem with the therapist rather than a natural feature of human relationship development.

The timeline for therapeutic openness varies enormously. Some clients, particularly those with secure attachment styles and positive previous therapy experiences, may feel comfortable disclosing within the first few sessions. Others, especially those with histories of trauma or betrayal, may need months before they can share certain experiences.

Cultural factors also influence disclosure timelines. Clients from backgrounds that emphasize emotional stoicism, privacy, or deference to authority may take longer to develop comfort with therapeutic self-disclosure. The Farber team's research found that therapists can actively facilitate this process — 46% of clients in their second survey said direct questions from the therapist would have helped them be more honest sooner [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
. This speaks to the importance of therapists actively modeling that all topics are discussable in therapy [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
.

10. Wanting to Avoid Real-World Consequences

Beyond mandatory reporting concerns, clients may withhold information because disclosure could lead to unwanted real-world outcomes. Farber's research found that avoiding unwanted therapeutic interventions was a commonly reported motive for dishonesty [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. Clients may fear that disclosing substance use will result in pressure to attend rehabilitation, that revealing relationship difficulties will lead to recommendations they are not ready to follow, or that admitting treatment dissatisfaction will disrupt the therapeutic arrangement.

Research on substance use concealment in therapy found that the primary motives for dishonesty included shame, fear of being judged, and concern about real-world consequences such as being sent to a rehabilitation facility [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. This practical dimension of therapeutic dishonesty is often overlooked — clients are not merely protecting their emotions but also their jobs, relationships, custody arrangements, and freedom.

This form of lying is particularly common in court-ordered therapy, addiction recovery programs, and PCSOT programs for sex offender supervision, where the stakes of full disclosure extend well beyond the therapy room. Understanding why people lie in these high-stakes contexts requires appreciating the complex calculus clients perform when deciding what to reveal.

The Impact of Dishonesty on Treatment

How Lying Undermines Therapeutic Progress

When clients are dishonest, therapists cannot accurately assess the severity of symptoms, identify core issues, or tailor interventions effectively. Research consistently shows that client concealment of salient information is associated with reduced symptom improvement at termination [5]Verified Psychological inflexibility prospectively predicts client non-disclosure in outpatient psychotherapy
Confirms 28-53% of clients intentionally kept secrets from therapist, and one-third believed non-disclosure hurt their progress.
. The therapeutic relationship itself suffers — a foundation built on incomplete information cannot support the weight of genuine psychological change.

The Farber team's research specifically documented that 62% of clients in their study had endorsed minimizing their suffering in some way [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
, making accurate symptom assessment nearly impossible. When clients minimize distress, therapists may underestimate the urgency of certain issues, fail to prescribe appropriate interventions, or prematurely conclude that treatment is progressing well.

However, the picture is not entirely negative. The same research found that most clients disliked being dishonest. As Farber noted, clients were "often conflicted, frustrated, or confused and decided concealment or outright dishonesty was their best option" — and they frequently wished their therapist could have helped them be more honest [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. This suggests that therapeutic dishonesty is not a fixed trait but a situational response that can be addressed with the right approach.

Therapist Confidentiality and Its Limits

What Is Protected and What Is Not

Understanding the precise boundaries of therapeutic confidentiality is essential for reducing fear-based dishonesty. In general, everything discussed in therapy is protected by law. Therapists are bound by strict ethical codes — the American Psychological Association's Ethics Code and state licensing regulations — to maintain client privacy.

However, there are specific, limited exceptions where therapists are legally required to break confidentiality:

Imminent danger to self: If a client presents an active, specific plan to harm themselves, the therapist may be required to take protective action, which could include contacting emergency services.

Imminent danger to others: If a client makes a credible threat against a specific, identifiable person, the therapist has a duty to warn the potential victim and/or contact law enforcement.

Child or elder abuse: Therapists are mandated reporters of suspected abuse or neglect of children, elderly individuals, or dependent adults.

Court orders: In certain legal proceedings, therapists may be compelled to release information under a valid court order.

It is important to note that expressing feelings of frustration, anger, or even occasional thoughts of self-harm does not automatically trigger mandatory reporting. The threshold is typically imminent risk of serious harm. Experienced therapists discuss these boundaries transparently at the start of treatment.

Building Trust With Your Therapist

Strategies for Greater Honesty in Therapy

The Farber team's research offers actionable guidance for both clients and therapists. In their second survey, 46% of clients said they would have been more honest if the therapist had asked direct questions [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
. This highlights the importance of therapists actively inviting honest disclosure rather than waiting for clients to volunteer difficult information.

For clients, several strategies can help:

Start small. You do not have to reveal everything at once. Begin with less threatening topics and work toward more difficult ones as trust develops.

Name the fear. Telling your therapist "I'm afraid to tell you something because I worry you'll judge me" is itself a form of honesty that opens the door to deeper disclosure.

Write it down. If speaking feels too difficult, consider writing what you need to share and giving it to your therapist to read.

Remember the goal. You are paying for therapy to help you. Withholding critical information is like going to a doctor and not mentioning your symptoms.

For therapists, the research is clear: therapists should model that all topics are discussable, ask direct questions when appropriate, and acknowledge the difficulty of disclosure [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
. Clients who described positive post-disclosure emotions most commonly reported feeling "relieved," "authentic," and "safe" [1]Verified Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.
. As Blanchard noted, "With time and patience, we can create conditions where clients can be comfortable disclosing their feelings" [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
.

When to Consider Switching Therapists

Some clients may never achieve full comfort with a particular therapist — not because of any failing on either side, but because the interpersonal chemistry is insufficient for the level of vulnerability required. If trust cannot be established after a reasonable period, finding a new therapist is a legitimate and healthy decision.

Signs it may be time to switch include: consistently feeling judged or misunderstood, being unable to discuss the topics that matter most, feeling worse after sessions rather than better, or a persistent sense that the therapist does not "get" you. The strength of the therapeutic alliance has been shown to be a more important predictor of outcomes than the specific type of therapy being used [11]Verified The alliance in adult psychotherapy: A meta-analytic synthesis
Confirms stable correlation (r =.28) between therapeutic alliance and treatment outcomes across 295 studies.
[12]Verified Psychotherapy Relationships That Work: Volume 1: Evidence-Based Therapist Contributions (3rd ed.)
Confirms the therapeutic relationship is a robust, independent predictor of treatment outcomes across all psychotherapy modalities.
, so prioritizing a good therapeutic fit is always worthwhile.

Polygraph Testing in Therapeutic Settings

How Polygraph Supports Therapeutic Honesty

Polygraph testing has an established role in certain therapeutic contexts, particularly in Post-Conviction Sex Offender Testing (PCSOT) programs. PCSOT was used in 70% of community sexual abuser programs for adult males in the United States as of 2002 [14]Verified Sex offender management using the polygraph: A critical review
Confirms PCSOT was used in 70% of community sexual abuser programs for adult males in the US as of 2002.
, and treatment and supervision programs utilize post-conviction polygraph examinations to support offender honesty and accountability as well as verify compliance with treatment [15]Verified The Use of Polygraph in Sex Offender Treatment
Confirms polygraph examinations assist treatment providers in identifying risks and needs, functioning as an accountability tool in treatment programs.
.

The polygraph serves as what researchers describe as a "truth facilitator" — encouraging disclosure of information that clients might otherwise withhold due to shame, denial, or fear [16]Verified Polygraph Testing and Sex Offenders
Confirms polygraph functions as a truth facilitator in PCSOT programs, encouraging disclosure of information clients might otherwise withhold.
. Treatment providers report that polygraph findings guide therapists in addressing denial or minimization during counseling [15]Verified The Use of Polygraph in Sex Offender Treatment
Confirms polygraph examinations assist treatment providers in identifying risks and needs, functioning as an accountability tool in treatment programs.
. There are three major types of PCSOT examinations: Sexual History Disclosure exams, Instant Offense exams, and Maintenance exams conducted periodically to assess adherence to treatment conditions [14]Verified Sex offender management using the polygraph: A critical review
Confirms PCSOT was used in 70% of community sexual abuser programs for adult males in the US as of 2002.
.

For more information on these specialized applications, see our guides on PCSOT for juvenile sex offender supervision and sexual addiction disclosure polygraph testing.

Research on psychophysiological responses in people with psychopathic tendencies has shown that polygraph testing effectiveness is maintained regardless of examinee personality characteristics [17]Verified Psychophysiological Responses of People with Psychopathic Tendencies to the Concealed Information Test
Confirms CIT effectiveness is maintained regardless of psychopathic tendency levels, supporting polygraph utility across diverse populations.
, supporting its utility across diverse therapeutic populations. The theoretical framework underlying polygraph testing continues to evolve, with modern research proposing that physiological responses reflect complex systemic organization rather than simple emotional reactions [18]Verified Theoretical Model of Polygraph Testing: Concerns and Prospects for their Solution
Proposes that physiological responses in polygraph testing reflect complex systemic organization rather than simple emotional reactions.
.

Pros

  • Research provides a clear roadmap for improving honesty in therapy — 46% of clients said direct questions would have helped them be more honest
  • Post-disclosure emotions are overwhelmingly positive — clients most commonly report feeling relieved, authentic, and safe
  • The therapeutic alliance is a proven, modifiable predictor of treatment success across all therapy types
  • Polygraph-assisted therapy programs create structured frameworks for overcoming shame-based concealment
  • Most clients want to be honest and feel conflicted about their dishonesty — this natural motivation supports change

Cons

  • Building therapeutic trust requires significant time investment that some clients may find frustrating
  • Mandatory reporting requirements create genuine barriers to full disclosure for some clients
  • Therapists detect client lies in only about 9% of cases, meaning dishonesty often goes unaddressed
  • Cultural and gender norms may add additional barriers to disclosure for certain populations

Frequently Asked Questions

How common is lying in therapy?

Research from Columbia University's Teachers College found that 93% of therapy clients reported being dishonest with their therapist at some point during treatment [1]Verified Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.
. A second survey found that 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about at least one specific topic [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. A replication study by Curtis (2020) found similar rates, with 89% of participants endorsing at least one form of deception [4]Verified Deception in psychotherapy: Frequency, typology and relationship
Replication study confirming 89% of participants endorsed at least one form of deception in therapy, corroborating Blanchard & Farber findings.
. This makes therapeutic dishonesty a near-universal phenomenon rather than an exceptional behavior.

What do therapy clients lie about most often?

The most commonly lied-about topic is distress minimization — 54% of clients reported pretending to feel happier and healthier than they really were [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
. Other common topics include the effectiveness of therapy, reasons for missed sessions or lateness, substance use, sexual behaviors, suicidal thoughts, and feelings about the therapist [1]Verified Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.
[3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. Clients were approximately 3.5 times more likely to lie by omission than by outright fabrication [1]Verified Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.
.

Can my therapist tell when I'm lying?

Research suggests therapists are not particularly effective at detecting client lies. In Farber's study, only 3.5% of patients voluntarily admitted their lies, and therapists detected dishonesty in only about 9% of cases [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
. Research on deception detection more broadly shows that even trained professionals typically perform only slightly better than chance at identifying deception [7]Verified Strong, but wrong: lay people's and police officers' beliefs about verbal and nonverbal cues to deception
Confirms both police officers and lay people endorsed non-diagnostic nonverbal cues as deception indicators, with no professional advantage in detection.
. This means the responsibility for honesty largely falls on the client.

Will my therapist report me if I admit to illegal drug use?

In most jurisdictions, therapists are not required to report adult clients' personal drug use to law enforcement. Mandatory reporting obligations are generally limited to imminent danger to self or others, child abuse, elder abuse, and court orders. However, specific laws vary by state and country, so it is worth asking your therapist about confidentiality boundaries at the start of treatment. Research shows that transparent discussion of these limits actually encourages greater honesty [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
.

Why is shame such a powerful barrier to honesty in therapy?

Shame was cited by 61% of respondents as their primary motivation for dishonesty in therapy [3]Verified Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.
. Unlike guilt, which relates to specific actions, shame strikes at one's core identity — the painful belief that one is fundamentally flawed [8]Verified Shame Resilience Theory: A Grounded Theory Study on Women and Shame
Confirms Brown's research on shame thriving in secrecy, and the distinction between shame (identity-based) and guilt (behavior-based).
. Brene Brown's research demonstrates that shame thrives in secrecy, silence, and judgment, making the therapy room both the ideal and the most feared place to confront it [8]Verified Shame Resilience Theory: A Grounded Theory Study on Women and Shame
Confirms Brown's research on shame thriving in secrecy, and the distinction between shame (identity-based) and guilt (behavior-based).
. The therapeutic paradox is that the information clients most need to share is the information they are most motivated to conceal.

How can I start being more honest with my therapist?

Start small by sharing less threatening topics first and working toward more difficult ones. Consider telling your therapist directly that you are afraid to share something — this itself opens a door. Writing difficult information down can also help. Research shows that 46% of clients said they would have been more honest if their therapist had asked direct questions [2]Verified The truth about lies
Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.
, so you can also ask your therapist to take a more active approach in guiding your disclosure.

Is it okay to switch therapists if I can't be honest?

Absolutely. Research consistently shows that the therapeutic alliance is one of the most important predictors of treatment success [11]Verified The alliance in adult psychotherapy: A meta-analytic synthesis
Confirms stable correlation (r =.28) between therapeutic alliance and treatment outcomes across 295 studies.
[12]Verified Psychotherapy Relationships That Work: Volume 1: Evidence-Based Therapist Contributions (3rd ed.)
Confirms the therapeutic relationship is a robust, independent predictor of treatment outcomes across all psychotherapy modalities.
. If you consistently feel unable to be honest with your therapist despite genuine effort, finding a new therapist is a legitimate and healthy decision. Not every client-therapist pairing produces the trust necessary for deep therapeutic work, and that is not a failure — it is a recognition that the relationship fit matters.

How is polygraph testing used in therapeutic settings?

Polygraph testing is most commonly used in Post-Conviction Sex Offender Testing (PCSOT) programs, where it serves as a tool to support honesty and verify compliance with treatment conditions [15]Verified The Use of Polygraph in Sex Offender Treatment
Confirms polygraph examinations assist treatment providers in identifying risks and needs, functioning as an accountability tool in treatment programs.
. It is also used in sexual addiction disclosure programs. The polygraph functions as a truth facilitator, encouraging clients to disclose information they might otherwise withhold due to shame or denial [16]Verified Polygraph Testing and Sex Offenders
Confirms polygraph functions as a truth facilitator in PCSOT programs, encouraging disclosure of information clients might otherwise withhold.
. Treatment providers use polygraph findings to guide therapeutic interventions and address minimization or denial patterns.

Sources & References

1
Lying in psychotherapy: Why and what clients don't tell their therapist about therapy and their relationship
Matt Blanchard, Barry A. Farber (2016) — Counselling Psychology Quarterly
Verified

Confirms 93% of 547 therapy clients reported lying, and 72.6% endorsed therapy-related deception. Published in Counselling Psychology Quarterly, 29(1), 90-112.

2
The truth about lies
APA Monitor on Psychology Staff (2019) — APA Monitor on Psychology
Verified

Confirms 54% minimized distress, 73% of lies never acknowledged in therapy, 46% would have been more honest with direct questions, and therapist detection rate of about 9%.

3
Secrets and Lies in Psychotherapy
Barry A. Farber, Matt Blanchard, Melanie Love (2019) — APA Books
Verified

Confirms two comprehensive studies involving over 1,000 clients, 61% cited shame as primary motive for dishonesty, 84% reported ongoing dishonesty about specific topics.

4
Deception in psychotherapy: Frequency, typology and relationship
Drew A. Curtis (2020) — Counselling and Psychotherapy Research
Verified

Replication study confirming 89% of participants endorsed at least one form of deception in therapy, corroborating Blanchard & Farber findings.

5

Confirms 28-53% of clients intentionally kept secrets from therapist, and one-third believed non-disclosure hurt their progress.

6
Memory Distortions, Confabulation, and Their Impact on Polygraph Examinations
Michał Widacki, John J. Palmatier (2025) — European Polygraph
Verified

Confirms confabulated memories can produce genuine-feeling physiological responses, relevant to understanding unconscious distortion in therapy.

7
Strong, but wrong: lay people's and police officers' beliefs about verbal and nonverbal cues to deception
Bogaard, G., Meijer, E.H., Vrij, A., Merckelbach, H. (2016) — PLoS ONE
Verified

Confirms both police officers and lay people endorsed non-diagnostic nonverbal cues as deception indicators, with no professional advantage in detection.

8
Shame Resilience Theory: A Grounded Theory Study on Women and Shame
Brené Brown (2006) — Families in Society
Verified

Confirms Brown's research on shame thriving in secrecy, and the distinction between shame (identity-based) and guilt (behavior-based).

9

Confirms memory suppression can eliminate physiological markers of recognition, relevant to understanding unconscious distortion in self-report.

10
'It is never okay to talk about suicide': Patients' reasons for concealing ideation in psychotherapy
Matt Blanchard, Barry A. Farber (2020) — Psychotherapy Research
Verified

Confirms patients conceal suicidal ideation due to fear of hospitalization and other adverse consequences.

11
The alliance in adult psychotherapy: A meta-analytic synthesis
Christoph Flückiger, A.C. Del Re, Bruce E. Wampold, Adam O. Horvath (2018) — Psychotherapy
Verified

Confirms stable correlation (r =.28) between therapeutic alliance and treatment outcomes across 295 studies.

12
Psychotherapy Relationships That Work: Volume 1: Evidence-Based Therapist Contributions (3rd ed.)
John C. Norcross, Michael J. Lambert (2019) — Oxford University Press
Verified

Confirms the therapeutic relationship is a robust, independent predictor of treatment outcomes across all psychotherapy modalities.

13

Confirms Erikson's eight stages of psychosocial development, with Ego Integrity vs. Despair as the final stage in late adulthood.

14

Confirms PCSOT was used in 70% of community sexual abuser programs for adult males in the US as of 2002.

15

Confirms polygraph examinations assist treatment providers in identifying risks and needs, functioning as an accountability tool in treatment programs.

16

Confirms polygraph functions as a truth facilitator in PCSOT programs, encouraging disclosure of information clients might otherwise withhold.

17

Confirms CIT effectiveness is maintained regardless of psychopathic tendency levels, supporting polygraph utility across diverse populations.

18
Theoretical Model of Polygraph Testing: Concerns and Prospects for their Solution
Maxim Yurievich Kamenskov (2020) — Psychology and Law
Verified

Proposes that physiological responses in polygraph testing reflect complex systemic organization rather than simple emotional reactions.

Need to book now? Our online booking system is open 24/7. Speak directly with our team about your test or booking.